Hey y'all! So I made it through the 30 days. It went by so fast actually like where did the time go? But Anyways to the point of this post...If you guys saw last month’s post (which if you haven't go check it out), I decided to challenge myself to go 30 days without looking at myself in the mirror in order to better my mental health and create a more positive relationship with my body. Here’s how that went.
The first two weeks were the hardest because I had to always be alert and accountable to myself to not look in the mirror. Every time I got out of the shower, I would have to turn sideways to not look at myself because the mirror in my bathroom is directly facing the shower. I had to do other little things like avert my eyes away from the mirror in my room while I was getting dressed or stand in a different section of my room where there was no mirror to look in. I will admit on December 2nd I caved and looked in the mirror. But good news is, it wasn’t the usual negative experience I was used to before I started this challenge. During the two weeks I watched a lot of body positivity and self-love videos on YouTube (my favorite channels for these were, and still are, Bodyposipanda and Grace F Victory, check them out guys) which I felt like helped change my mindset a bit. These girls were truly confident in there bodies and lived their lives in the way I wanted to which was to not count calories anymore and not be so anal about what foods I eat. So, when I looked in the mirror on this day, I was way less critical of myself because I felt like I was really thinking about all the messages in the videos I’ve watched and I was telling my body way more positive things like how grateful I am to have a body that has gotten me through 22 years of my life.
After that second week, not looking in the mirror was a lot easier to do. I found it freeing and mentally clearing. Before, I would spend hours upon hours thinking about my body, what I was eating, and looking at my body constantly. Now, I have found that I have more space in my brain to think about other things like school and the future. My goals in regard to my eating habits and health have changed too. In my initial post, I spoke a lot about calories and how much calories I was consuming and how much calories I’ve bumped myself up to. I realize that this is no way to live life. There will be days where I want to eat more than the 1800 calorie goal I set myself, eat like shit, and there will be those times where I have no choice but to do that because that's just life. Everything exists in a balance and I cannot spend my time obsessively trying to stick to a number. I suggest if you are struggling with a similar situation to me to take this advice and follow it. You’re body will end up where it is meant to end up living your life in a maintainable way. Some bodies are meant to hold onto more fat than others, some people are bigger, some smaller...we all come in different shapes and sizes and that is what makes us beautiful.
So, this has been a transformative journey for me. Please leave a comment below on your thoughts about body image and society because I would really like to know what you guys think. Also, I was thinking of doing more body positivity posts and health posts like what I do at the gym and a realistic what I eat in a typical day. Let me know below if you have any suggestions!
