The 30 Day No Mirror Challenge

No, this isn’t the no mirror makeup challenge. This is a challenge I gave myself to better my mental health. In a previous post on beauty standards, I briefly touched upon my struggles with my body and an insecurity that I have. If you haven’t checked out that post, go back and check it out for some background - it’s such a good read.

Starting November 26, 2017 I told myself I wasn’t going to look at myself in the mirror for at least 30 days (ideally I’d like to do more, but small goals people). I’m not referring to my face, but to my body. Just another clarification, I mean my body without clothes. Let me explain why.

At the end of July 2017 I decided to start a health and fitness journey unlike one I have ever done. In 2015 I went to the gym regularly for a while, but my diet was crap, and you know what they say - you can’t outrun a bad diet. So this past July I decided I was going to get my nutrition on point and start tracking calories as well as frequent the gym. I didn’t know where to start so I binge-watched a lot of “what I eat in a day” YouTube videos from people who were in the shape I wanted to be in. I downloaded the Lifesum app (which is a great fitness app if you don’t like using Myfitnesspal), put in my stats, and for around three months until somewhere in October, I stuck to this change and lost 5 pounds (FYI my goal was to lose 10 in total). I’m 5’9” and I was eating around 1500-1600 calories a day for those three months (maintenance calorie intake for me is around 2200 in case you were wondering). I’ve just recently upped my calories to around 1800-1900 because your girl loves food, however, I stopped using the app because I feel like it was causing me to obsess about everything even more.

After I took my progress photos and saw the changes after the three months, something in me changed too. I started looking at my body in the mirror every single day, every chance I got. It was bad. So bad to the point that it was all I could think about, and I started to get frustrated when I wasn’t seeing any changes and all I could think about was how much longer I have to go to get to the body I want to have. Literally every time I looked in the mirror I would suck in, pull, and move my body until it got to what I wanted it to look like, and then take in that I wasn’t there yet. This mentality started to eat away at me and it consumed me. If I slipped and had a cheat day or two, I would punish myself and put myself down and say things to myself like “way to go, now you just delayed your goal even more, I’m not going to make it, etc.” This mindset was so bad for me that one day I had to stop and say to myself, "that’s enough, you’re destroying your body image and who cares what my body looks like to others right now?"

That is why I decided to start this challenge. I need to detoxify my mind and focus on the important things in life and also so I can have a better relationship with food. I know it’s not going to be an easy battle, but it’s already been a day and I feel so much better mentally already. I’m not worrying about how much more weight I need to lose or how many more calories I have left, I’m focusing on my school work and job that I need to do. I’ve been doing things to avoid the mirror like facing away from it when I get out of the shower and not looking in the mirror as I’m getting dressed. Note: this does not include looking at my body clothed lol. I need to take these steps for my mental health.

If you are obsessing over your body image as well, join me in this challenge and let’s work together for better mental health because who cares how your body looks if your mentality isn’t looking good first?